Why? It's the word that I hear most often out of the mouth of my soon-to-be three year old. For a few months now she's been asking "WHY?" and I hoped it would be a short-lived phase, but it seems to be sticking around for awhile.
She wants to know why I put my pants on like that. Why do we have to wait at the red light? Why do I comb my hair like that? Why do we wash the dishes like that? Why do we have the turn the TV off? Why? Why? Why?
Most of the questions are valid. And usually I have a pretty good answer. At least I think I give a good answer. But inevitably, the first WHY is always followed by another WHY. And then another....and another. My answer is never good enough and I usually have to end the conversation with, "That's just the way it is, sweetie."
So, this morning as we were sitting at the breakfast table, I was shocked when my answer to her WHY was finally satisfactory.
We were sitting across the table from one another; just the two of us (Chris had already left early for work and Josie was in the bathroom brushing her teeth). She was munching away on her Cinnamon Toast Crunch and I was enjoying my peanut butter flavored Puffins while I read out of the 4th chapter in the book of James. I picked up my pen and underlined a portion of verse 7 and 8 then wrote a "P" for promise in the margin and circled it. (James 4:7-8 Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come near to God and he will come near to you.) And that's when our conversation started.
Izzy: Why do you have that pen?
Me: So I can mark in my bible.
Izzy: Why?
Me: So I can underline God's promises to us.
Izzy: Why?
Me: So I can remember them.
Izzy: Why?
Me: So I can be more like Jesus.
Izzy: Hmm *with a nod of her head and a look of satisfaction*
Really?!! Did I just answer the question that never seems have a good enough answer?? I FINALLY answered the WHY and she accepted it.
And then I thought, isn't that funny?
"Jesus" was the answer.
I should of known.
Jesus is ALWAYS the answer.
Thursday, January 26, 2012
Friday, January 6, 2012
How It All Began
In celebration of our 12 year anniversary tomorrow, here is our love story: (it's a quick one, so don't blink)
The summer of 1999 I had returned home to my mom's house in TX after receiving my Bachelor of Science degree in biology from Butler University (in Indianapolis, IN) and I had BIG plans following that summer. Before I left school, my track coach offered to pay for graduate school if I would be his graduate assistant for both the cross-county and track teams. I was thrilled! I didn't even care that I would have to study for a Masters in Chemistry (that was all that was offered for the career path I was headed down). Besides, it only took me three tries to pass Chemistry 1 in undergraduate school. And, not only would I get to prolong my college/partying days, but I had always hoped to be a coach and inspire many athletes as several coaches had done for me along my athletic journey.
Buuuuuut, things didn't necessarily go as I had planned that summer. During the dog-days of summer (my first REAL summer in TX - ugh) I found myself contemplating who I had become during those 5 years of higher education. I really didn't like who I was and felt I often lived a double-life. With friends I was a foul-mouth, partying and drinking girl. With family I was reserved but poised and gave the impression that I had it all together. It was hard living like that and I was desperately searching for who I REALLY wanted to be.
That summer I started attending a church close to home. It was there that I met a group of folks my age who invited me to attend a small-group bible study. Over the next few weeks I began to study about the character of Jesus Christ. And I don't remember exactly how it all happened (if I had known how monumental it was at the time I would have recorded the whole thing) but when I discovered my true identify in Christ, I knew I wanted Him as MY Savior and MY Lord. And so it was, that one evening, near the 1st of June in 1999, I accepted Christ as Savior and Lord...no turning back! Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah!!!
Within a week of my conversion from living in darkness to living in the Light, I attended a fun outing at Lake Conroe with the other members of my bible study. I had a great time but for whatever reason I had to leave early. And just as I was saying goodbye, some new guy opened the sliding glass door to the lake-front condo, jumped right into the conversation, and started blabbing his mouth about how great Texas A&M is as a school. He sounded so arrogant and I didn't want to hear anymore so I quickly introduced myself then exited out the front door.
About a week later I was feeling lonely so I decided to hit the gym for a good workout. I walked towards the locker room, past a long line of elliptical trainers, when a male voice yelled out, "Hey! Don't I know you?" I stopped and quickly checked this sweaty guy over but had no idea who it was. He explained that we had been introduced at the lake and he probably used some "christianese" terms that I didn't know at the time. I politely let him know that I was at the lake the previous weekend but didn't believe we attended the same outing. Not wanting to be rude, I stuck out my hand and introduced myself in hopes of ending the conversation and getting on with my workout. Just as I was about to turn to walk away, he said "I'm pretty sure that was you at the lake cause you were wearing that same shirt." Well, ok, maybe it WAS me. I really wasn't trying to deny it. And I did have to admit there weren't too many girls around Texas wearing a Butler University cross-country t-shirt. Thinking that this guy probably thought I was a total liar, I awkwardly left the conversation and went to the far end of the gym to lift some weights (and stay far away from the cardio equipment). He may have thought I was a liar, but HE was a total LOSER! I mean, obviously he didn't have a job if he was working out at the gym at 10am on a Tuesday.
So I was minding my own business, lifting a few weights (when I really wanted to be on the treadmill), and then I saw sweaty guy walking towards me. I thought, "Maybe he's just taking a shortcut to the drinking fountain. Don't make eye contact. Don't. Make. Eye. Contact." Crud! I made eye contact. And then I smiled and he came over and sat down at the machine next to me. Surprisingly, conversation flowed easily. I found out he actually DID have a job and a pretty cool one at that (and that got him off the Loser list). After a few minutes (I have no idea how our conversation ended up here) he asked if I played ping-pong. I paused briefly, trying to play the pong-shark, then said "Yes. I've played a few times." What I didn't tell him was that I grew up with a ping-pong table in our garage. That I first started playing at age 6 by standing on a chair. That I had made a guy in college so mad when I beat him 5 games to nothing, that I never got a second date. That I rarely lost. So when he told me he had a ping-pong table as a dining room table and invited me over for dinner and a match, I played it cool.
Let's just say dinner was great (I believe he made manicotti) AAAAAAAND I killed him at ping-pong. (And then his roommate came home and I beat him too.) And it was then that I learned the first thing I liked about him...humility. After a great date, he walked me to my car and he hugged me and didn't try to make any other smooth moves, and I knew I liked that he was such a gentleman. And then a week later when he took me to the lake to go water skiing, I knew I liked another thing about him...his hairy, muscular chest. :-)
At this point, I wasn't even close to falling in love or being head-over-heals, I was just enjoying spending some time with a great guy who didn't mind me beating him at ping-pong.
Not much time passed before I was baptized in the backyard pool of one of the pastors at the church I was attending. It was a very intimate occasion, nothing flashy. Just me, my mom and stepdad, the pastor, the sweaty guy :-), and my profession of faith in Jesus Christ.
With wet hair and a big smile on my face, we all went to dinner that evening. As I sat next to this gentleman, who was full of humility, who had a great career, rock-hard pecs, and a deeply rooted love for the Lord...I realized that I wanted to be close to him. I wanted to hold his hand. To snuggle next to him. To feel his arm around me. I was really starting to like him.
So just to put this into perspective time-wise, the day we met at the gym was right around the first week of June. The first two weeks after we simply spent time hanging out. And after that, we started dating. It all happened pretty quick so don't think I'm leaving huge chunks out of the story. It really happened this fast.
It's hard to remember the exact time frame, but sometime within the first two weeks of dating, Chris (I don't want to call him sweaty guy anymore) had to go to work for a few days. Granted, he had been to work during these first fews weeks but mostly it was just day trips here and there. This time, he was gone for three days. And when he returned after those three days and I opened up the front door of my mom's house to greet him, I knew I never wanted to be away from him again. My heart was his.
On July 3rd we arranged to meet a few of his friends at Lake Conroe to watch a fireworks display. I remember it being magical. We were snuggled up on a blanket watching the colors bursting into the night sky. And that's all I remember...'cause he kissed me that night and nothing else mattered.
And seriously, the rest is history. Within a few more weeks we were engaged, at the top of a hill overlooking the city of Santa Rosa, CA at night. And six months after that, on January 7th, 2000, we were married...with two ping-pong tables at the reception. (I think the pastor beat me that night, but COME ON! I was in a wedding gown for cryin' out loud!) I never returned to Indianapolis to be a coach and PRAISE THE LORD I never had to attempt a Masters in Chemistry. (Believe me, the biology degree makes me sound WAY smarter than I really am.)
It wasn't my plan for my life, but it was God's plan. And I'd choose His plan ANY day!
The summer of 1999 I had returned home to my mom's house in TX after receiving my Bachelor of Science degree in biology from Butler University (in Indianapolis, IN) and I had BIG plans following that summer. Before I left school, my track coach offered to pay for graduate school if I would be his graduate assistant for both the cross-county and track teams. I was thrilled! I didn't even care that I would have to study for a Masters in Chemistry (that was all that was offered for the career path I was headed down). Besides, it only took me three tries to pass Chemistry 1 in undergraduate school. And, not only would I get to prolong my college/partying days, but I had always hoped to be a coach and inspire many athletes as several coaches had done for me along my athletic journey.
Buuuuuut, things didn't necessarily go as I had planned that summer. During the dog-days of summer (my first REAL summer in TX - ugh) I found myself contemplating who I had become during those 5 years of higher education. I really didn't like who I was and felt I often lived a double-life. With friends I was a foul-mouth, partying and drinking girl. With family I was reserved but poised and gave the impression that I had it all together. It was hard living like that and I was desperately searching for who I REALLY wanted to be.
That summer I started attending a church close to home. It was there that I met a group of folks my age who invited me to attend a small-group bible study. Over the next few weeks I began to study about the character of Jesus Christ. And I don't remember exactly how it all happened (if I had known how monumental it was at the time I would have recorded the whole thing) but when I discovered my true identify in Christ, I knew I wanted Him as MY Savior and MY Lord. And so it was, that one evening, near the 1st of June in 1999, I accepted Christ as Savior and Lord...no turning back! Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah!!!
Within a week of my conversion from living in darkness to living in the Light, I attended a fun outing at Lake Conroe with the other members of my bible study. I had a great time but for whatever reason I had to leave early. And just as I was saying goodbye, some new guy opened the sliding glass door to the lake-front condo, jumped right into the conversation, and started blabbing his mouth about how great Texas A&M is as a school. He sounded so arrogant and I didn't want to hear anymore so I quickly introduced myself then exited out the front door.
About a week later I was feeling lonely so I decided to hit the gym for a good workout. I walked towards the locker room, past a long line of elliptical trainers, when a male voice yelled out, "Hey! Don't I know you?" I stopped and quickly checked this sweaty guy over but had no idea who it was. He explained that we had been introduced at the lake and he probably used some "christianese" terms that I didn't know at the time. I politely let him know that I was at the lake the previous weekend but didn't believe we attended the same outing. Not wanting to be rude, I stuck out my hand and introduced myself in hopes of ending the conversation and getting on with my workout. Just as I was about to turn to walk away, he said "I'm pretty sure that was you at the lake cause you were wearing that same shirt." Well, ok, maybe it WAS me. I really wasn't trying to deny it. And I did have to admit there weren't too many girls around Texas wearing a Butler University cross-country t-shirt. Thinking that this guy probably thought I was a total liar, I awkwardly left the conversation and went to the far end of the gym to lift some weights (and stay far away from the cardio equipment). He may have thought I was a liar, but HE was a total LOSER! I mean, obviously he didn't have a job if he was working out at the gym at 10am on a Tuesday.
So I was minding my own business, lifting a few weights (when I really wanted to be on the treadmill), and then I saw sweaty guy walking towards me. I thought, "Maybe he's just taking a shortcut to the drinking fountain. Don't make eye contact. Don't. Make. Eye. Contact." Crud! I made eye contact. And then I smiled and he came over and sat down at the machine next to me. Surprisingly, conversation flowed easily. I found out he actually DID have a job and a pretty cool one at that (and that got him off the Loser list). After a few minutes (I have no idea how our conversation ended up here) he asked if I played ping-pong. I paused briefly, trying to play the pong-shark, then said "Yes. I've played a few times." What I didn't tell him was that I grew up with a ping-pong table in our garage. That I first started playing at age 6 by standing on a chair. That I had made a guy in college so mad when I beat him 5 games to nothing, that I never got a second date. That I rarely lost. So when he told me he had a ping-pong table as a dining room table and invited me over for dinner and a match, I played it cool.
Let's just say dinner was great (I believe he made manicotti) AAAAAAAND I killed him at ping-pong. (And then his roommate came home and I beat him too.) And it was then that I learned the first thing I liked about him...humility. After a great date, he walked me to my car and he hugged me and didn't try to make any other smooth moves, and I knew I liked that he was such a gentleman. And then a week later when he took me to the lake to go water skiing, I knew I liked another thing about him...his hairy, muscular chest. :-)
At this point, I wasn't even close to falling in love or being head-over-heals, I was just enjoying spending some time with a great guy who didn't mind me beating him at ping-pong.
Not much time passed before I was baptized in the backyard pool of one of the pastors at the church I was attending. It was a very intimate occasion, nothing flashy. Just me, my mom and stepdad, the pastor, the sweaty guy :-), and my profession of faith in Jesus Christ.
With wet hair and a big smile on my face, we all went to dinner that evening. As I sat next to this gentleman, who was full of humility, who had a great career, rock-hard pecs, and a deeply rooted love for the Lord...I realized that I wanted to be close to him. I wanted to hold his hand. To snuggle next to him. To feel his arm around me. I was really starting to like him.
So just to put this into perspective time-wise, the day we met at the gym was right around the first week of June. The first two weeks after we simply spent time hanging out. And after that, we started dating. It all happened pretty quick so don't think I'm leaving huge chunks out of the story. It really happened this fast.
It's hard to remember the exact time frame, but sometime within the first two weeks of dating, Chris (I don't want to call him sweaty guy anymore) had to go to work for a few days. Granted, he had been to work during these first fews weeks but mostly it was just day trips here and there. This time, he was gone for three days. And when he returned after those three days and I opened up the front door of my mom's house to greet him, I knew I never wanted to be away from him again. My heart was his.
On July 3rd we arranged to meet a few of his friends at Lake Conroe to watch a fireworks display. I remember it being magical. We were snuggled up on a blanket watching the colors bursting into the night sky. And that's all I remember...'cause he kissed me that night and nothing else mattered.
And seriously, the rest is history. Within a few more weeks we were engaged, at the top of a hill overlooking the city of Santa Rosa, CA at night. And six months after that, on January 7th, 2000, we were married...with two ping-pong tables at the reception. (I think the pastor beat me that night, but COME ON! I was in a wedding gown for cryin' out loud!) I never returned to Indianapolis to be a coach and PRAISE THE LORD I never had to attempt a Masters in Chemistry. (Believe me, the biology degree makes me sound WAY smarter than I really am.)
It wasn't my plan for my life, but it was God's plan. And I'd choose His plan ANY day!
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
Saying Goodbye
I vividly remember the first time I had to say "goodbye". I remember the hurt, the loneliness, and the fear of the unknown. I was 7 years old when I had to say goodbye to my best friend whom I had lived next door to for 5 years. She was the only neighbor my age on our lonely dirt road out in the country of Santa Rosa, CA. So the day we backed the station wagon out of the driveway for the last time in order to move 2 1/2 hours away and we made our way down that dirt road, I wondered when I would see her again and if I'd ever make another friend like her.
Not too long after our move, I made a wonderful new friend. Our families were totally different but I loved the time spent at her house with her 5 siblings. It was loud and crazy and so much fun! Three years later her dad was transferred for work and I rarely saw her after that.
In junior high, I acquired a new best friend who was the complete opposite of me. She was totally girly and I was all tomboy. She wore pretty dresses and played in piano recitals. I wore sweat pants and played every sport. Somehow we fit together. Within a couple of years she and her family returned to their home state of Oklahoma. Although our visits since then have been few, I am so fortunate she remains a dear friend!
Throughout the college years I had to say goodbye to many friends as some transferred schools and even as I transferred from Boise St. to Butler University. And of course upon graduation there were more goodbyes. Most of those friends I've seen only once or twice in the past 15 years.
But no matter how many goodbyes I've had to say, it doesn't get any easier. Today I had to say "farewell" to one of my dearest friends. Knowing she will return in 3 years or that Skype will keep us connected hardly seems to bring much comfort. You see, this friend isn't moving across town nor to another state. It's not even a desirable location to visit. My dear friend is moving to a city where three-quarters of the 16 million tightly-packed residents live in the slums; where the government can not be trusted; and where she and her family will not be able to navigate the city without a native guide. Within the next 48 hours she will call Lagos, Nigeria "home".
My only comfort is found in knowing that my God goes with her, even BEFORE her. That He has plans to prosper her and not to harm her. And that He hears all my prayers for her.
Goodbye sweet friend.
Not too long after our move, I made a wonderful new friend. Our families were totally different but I loved the time spent at her house with her 5 siblings. It was loud and crazy and so much fun! Three years later her dad was transferred for work and I rarely saw her after that.
In junior high, I acquired a new best friend who was the complete opposite of me. She was totally girly and I was all tomboy. She wore pretty dresses and played in piano recitals. I wore sweat pants and played every sport. Somehow we fit together. Within a couple of years she and her family returned to their home state of Oklahoma. Although our visits since then have been few, I am so fortunate she remains a dear friend!
Throughout the college years I had to say goodbye to many friends as some transferred schools and even as I transferred from Boise St. to Butler University. And of course upon graduation there were more goodbyes. Most of those friends I've seen only once or twice in the past 15 years.
But no matter how many goodbyes I've had to say, it doesn't get any easier. Today I had to say "farewell" to one of my dearest friends. Knowing she will return in 3 years or that Skype will keep us connected hardly seems to bring much comfort. You see, this friend isn't moving across town nor to another state. It's not even a desirable location to visit. My dear friend is moving to a city where three-quarters of the 16 million tightly-packed residents live in the slums; where the government can not be trusted; and where she and her family will not be able to navigate the city without a native guide. Within the next 48 hours she will call Lagos, Nigeria "home".
My only comfort is found in knowing that my God goes with her, even BEFORE her. That He has plans to prosper her and not to harm her. And that He hears all my prayers for her.
Goodbye sweet friend.
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